


Dream visits

by ItsJina



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Fluff, Hopeful Ending, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-09-28
Updated: 2013-09-28
Packaged: 2017-12-27 21:18:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 919
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/983735
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ItsJina/pseuds/ItsJina
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean sees Cas in his dreams after Cas went back to Heaven and closed the gates forever.</p><p>[written during season 8, before knowing the finale]</p>
            </blockquote>





	Dream visits

**Author's Note:**

> This was originally put in a compilation of my ficlets, but I decided to take some out and put them as stand alone.

Dean was taking it better than Sam would’ve thought. Sam could usually sense his pretense, but Dean seemed to be truly okay. He was also sleeping a lot more, strangely, napping whenever he could. But Sam wasn’t going to ask him about it, at least not yet, if that’s how it helped him deal with the loss of Cas.

Dean doesn’t try to explain his behavior. It would bring too many questions to too many things he doesn’t want to talk about yet or even know how to start to explain. For now, it was strangely simple and he wanted to keep it that way. And call him selfish, but he wanted to keep this for himself a little longer. He was keeping a secret from Sam but maybe Sam wouldn’t mind. So he kept Cas’s visits in his dreams to himself.

 

Dean thought it was just a dream the first time Cas visited. Believing it was only a dream, he grabbed Cas into a tight hug and didn’t let go for a long time. He buried his face into Cas’s neck and just stayed like that. His face may or may not have been wet. Cas didn’t say anything and Dean hadn’t expect anything—he was just so damn happy to see Cas, even if it was only in a dream. When Cas left to heaven and the holy gates closed, Dean didn’t get the chance to reconcile with Cas completely. And that ate him up so much.

And then Cas spoke. Dean was shocked and then immediately suspicious because how was it possible? How could it be? How was Cas able to visit his dreams when the gates have closed? Cas didn’t know either. Maybe it was their “profound bond”, Cas said. Maybe it was because when he had put Dean back together in hell, parts of his grace had meld into Dean’s soul. Maybe that’s why he’s able to manifest and choose to appear in Dean’s dreams, though he wouldn’t be able to appear completely in real life because most of his being was still in Heaven. The subconscious, the dreams, it was a much thinner veil that Cas can pass through.

But really, all of it was a mystery that even Cas wasn’t too sure. But Dean wasn’t gonna look at a gift horse in the mouth. He’ll take what he can get.

He didn’t know if Cas was going to appear every time he slept, but after a couple weeks with Cas not missing a beat, Dean relaxed and looked forward to his sleeps. Cas was always there already, waiting. He never missed any of their appointments.

Sometimes, they were at the lake with Dean fishing and Cas sitting by his side, both just enjoying the sound of the water and the slight breeze of the wind. Sometimes, they talk about trivial things, making small talk. Sometimes, they sat under the shade of a tree looking out towards the lake and they talked. Actually talk, with no interruptions, with no defenses up. Actual talks of the sensitive issues that they were not able to talk outside in the real world.

And in his dreams, it was easier, much easier, as if everything just made sense. If their hands touched, it was not a problem. If he looked at Cas a certain way, there was no one to judge, least of all from Cas. Hell, Cas gave him more looks than he did, probably. And in his dreams, desires, needs, wants—he could act upon them without inhibitions. So he did. After a month and a half, he kissed Cas. Cas sighed into his mouth as if he had been waiting. He was sorry to make Cas wait; even sorrier that it had to be in a dream, where it would never be as real. Sometimes, it was like kissing air.

But they took what they could, this mystery that had thrust itself upon them both.

Three months later though, Dean finally asked about the elephant question in the room. “Are you able to come back?”

Cas knew perfectly what he wanted to know and he shrugged. “It’s possible. At the moment, things have started to settle down in Heaven. The factions are finally getting their things together and we’re deciding on what kind of government should Heaven be. But much is still in chaos. Many are still dead. I don’t know if any of them will ever allow Heaven’s gates to be open again, to be tempted by what humans and Earth can give us.”

At “tempted”, Cas linked his fingers with Dean’s. Dean can feel most of his hand. Most of it.

"So basically, you don’t know squat if you can come back," Dean said and swallowed hard. He didn’t know how long this would last. How long he can go on just almost real touches.

Cas nodded, but he faced Dean and, using his hand to bring Dean’s face to him, he said, “We’ll figure something out.”

Dean tried for a smile. “Yeah?”

"Have faith, Dean."

Dean laughed and Cas smiled before saying, “We’ll make it up as we go. After all, we’ve ripped the pages before, haven’t we?”

That thought settled in him comfortably and reassuringly. Hope surged throughout him and he grinned. His hand wrapped around Cas’s hand as firmly as possible. “You’re right. We’ve faced and done impossible things before. We can do it again.”

Cas smiled and for a brief moment, Dean can feel Cas wholly and completely.


End file.
